my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦ðŸ¼â€â™€ï¸
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
Randomize