It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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