come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
Randomize
