im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
Randomize
