So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
I just totok an inventory of my purse: 1 apple, 1 pair of underwear, 7 condoms, $18 in ones, a check with "for sexual healing" in the subject line, and a 4 oz bottle of wine.
Oh! and a letter from a judge saying I got an interview. Cause that balances it out.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
Randomize