i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
Randomize
