How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
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