To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
Randomize
