I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
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