That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Randomize
