There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
I supernannyed him into submission
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Randomize
