am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize