Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
