they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
There are leaves in my underwear?
Randomize
