I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
