She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize
