Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
