Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
Randomize
