Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
Randomize
