Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize
