i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Randomize
