I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Randomize
