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• (574): View more from Indiana

  I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.

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• (905): View more from Toronto

  Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?

  (1-905): View more from Toronto

  i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood

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• (+91): View more from India

  Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.

  (+91): View more from India

  what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?

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• (361): View more from Texas

  Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??

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• (414): View more from Wisconsin

  You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.

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• (781): View more from Massachusetts

  I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.

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• (781): View more from Massachusetts

  I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again

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• (415): View more from California

  I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.

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• (402): View more from Nebraska

  dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo

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• (443): View more from Maryland

  i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT

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• (808): View more from Hawaii

  Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?

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• (406): View more from Montana

  I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.

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• (705): View more from Ontario

  Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have

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• (407): View more from Florida

  She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!

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• (845): View more from New York

  I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it

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