They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
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