so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
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