I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
you never un-have a 4some
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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