hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
I went to an adult Halloween party last night dressed as Mrs. Doubtfire, but I woke up on a stranger's couch surrounded by sleeping children in karate gi's. And I accidentally flushed my granny wig mid-puke, so if they wake up I'm gonna have to convince them that I'm just a weird older man and not a terrible cross dresser.
How did you come to this point in your life?
Good bartenders.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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