the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
then he tried to convert me to islam
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
Randomize
