We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
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