i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Randomize