thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
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