Cold hands, warm shart.
Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
Randomize
