She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
She bit a glass in half.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
