So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Randomize
