the new term for farting is butt boxing.
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize