wanna go halves on a baby?
Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
I met my future husband in an elevator. Think Hispanic version of Dr. Bunsen Honeydew from the Muppets, but with eyes like Michael Fassbender.
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
Randomize