wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
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