That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize
