I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
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