when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Randomize
