Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
