Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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