I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
We're too hungover to prance.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize