I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
Randomize
