I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
