So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize