Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Randomize
