I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize