it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
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