But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
Still dying that you shit outside
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
Randomize
