Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize